In the last several months, I have lost a friend to major depression, another to breast cancer, and a friend's mother died unexpectedly at the age of 67. And I have many friends, like myself, who deal with chronic pain on a daily basis. It has become increasingly difficult to do activities that I love to do, and dealing with the loss of function with a bad back, and seeing others go through their pain.

Asking for help is not something I learned to do well when I grew up. Independence, especially for a female, was a big deal for my parents to teach my sister and I. My mother, at one point, had to sit on my father's lap when I froze on the diving board during swim lessons. He was going to come get me, but my mother refused, stating she needs to learn everything she can now so she can survive as an adult. For that, I am forever grateful, because I would not have had the wonderful experiences I have had to this point in my life.

I had a plan to go on a cruise. I booked the airlines with wheel chair assistance. That was a toughy for me.  I am only 50, and used to be able to handle the airports without a problem. I was amazed, though, at how wonderful everyone was during the whole trip. No questions asked, no funny looks.

Once on the cruise, I refused to let anything stop me. The pain in my knees and ankles, at times, seemed unbearable. My ankles were 3 times their usual size once I arrived home. I thought I did what I needed to keep the pain down. Whatever I did, I believe my mindset of "I'm going to do this" is what got me through the trip. Yes, I needed my pain medication. Yes, I brought my cane. Yes, I asked for wheel chair assistance when needed. Could I have done more to reduce the pain? Probably. My point is, I made it.
And I met some beautiful people. One couple gave me hope that there is love still in this world. One woman had surgery on her ankle and was still not weight bearing on the foot. But she made it. Another had limited vision and was on her first cruise. All were smiling, enjoying themselves, and showing me how wonderful it is to be in this world. They made a difference in my world, and now I have new friends.

I can still feel the sting of the loss of friends and personal functioning. But I was reminded, also, that life is good. What a wonderful world when all we have to do is say "I can and I will."